Today's magic

It's the end of the day, and I almost don't want this day to end. There was just something magical about today and how Fly and I related to each other.

It wasn't that he didn't misbehave. But Fly did actually listen to me today. It probably helps that he is speaking more in real sentences now.

Fly seemed unusually contented. He sang songs with me while we waited in line at the store. He pointed out all the red lights, green lights and yellow lights as we drove in the car. Fly ate plenty at lunch. Then he patiently (!) waited for me to clean up afterward so we could play outside -- for an hour. He napped without a fight. He read some word cards. Fly even tried two new foods at dinner. He didn't want to go to bed tonight -- he wanted to stay up and sing songs with me. But I put on some music for him to listen to while he fell asleep.

I know better than to expect Fly will be the same tomorrow. He is ever growing and changing. There are hardly two days alike for him. And that makes today's magic even more fleeting and sweet.

What I'd Wear Wednesday: One secret

What I'd wear today if I could: Comfort. Comfort, comfort, comfort is all I'm looking for these days. I'm at 23 weeks now and running out of regular clothes to wear. Some of my looser items still fit, thank goodness, but the pickings are slim. Er ... OK, they're not slim -- they're large, but you know what I mean.

Feeling uninspired, I thought I'd share a tip for one way I find items for my WIWW posts. It's a site called Shop It To Me, which I found out about some time ago. The site sends you e-mails featuring clothes and accessories on sale. You sign up for a free account, choose your size(s) and favorite stores or designers, and how frequently you want to be e-mailed. Then you just wait for the fashion eye candy to pop up in your inbox. So there you go -- now you know one of my secrets.

Here are some discounted goodies that showed up in my e-mail this week.

This Free People top, found at Bloomingdales:



A BCBG Max Azria dress, also found at Bloomingdales:



A sweet pair of Betsey Johnson espadrilles, found at Endless Shoes & Handbags:



A bowler-style bag by Prada:



And a pair of cropped cargos from Lauren by Ralph Lauren:



Shop It To Me has children's and men's sizes and stores listed as well, so it's a good resource for shopping for your whole family. And getting deals!

Joy in the paradox

In these days when I alternate between sleeplessness and not having the chance to sleep enough ... when I look forward to meeting my baby for the first time while wishing I had more time until the baby arrives ... when I feel young while acting as Fly's playmate but old while enforcing the rules ... when I express thanks for the life JP and I have been blessed with yet still feel there should be more ... I know there is joy in the paradox.

Like a boy who runs so fast he seemingly levitates.



A stolen solitary moment to dream, scheme and visualize despite my lack of energy to do anything about it.



Realizing how colorful life really is, while often feeling drab myself.



And enjoying the beauty of small things that are, collectively, rather grand.

Viral

Fly had a virus last week, after we returned from the Bahamas, and we spent most of last week just basically doing nothing.

And it was so, so nice.

When we finally came out of our cave, I confessed to friend Guinevere I actually enjoyed Fly getting sick. She didn't flinch, wasn't shocked, didn't gape at me or carry her child away from my toxic presence. What a friend.

She understands that Fly getting sick meant he was by my side most of the day -- on my lap or in my arms for a hug, even -- he didn't act up and I got some much-needed rest, even though I had to get up with him in the middle of the night.

It was good to know I can still soothe my boy and that he still wants his mama to be there for him.

What I'd Wear Wednesday: Bauble ring

What I'd wear today if I could: a cool bauble ring. And a different bauble ring the next day. And the next. There's just something fun about having beads beebopping around on your finger that I suddenly find so appealing.

I like this one found at Etsy:



Here is one with a lot going on, also at Etsy:



This one from Guess looks polished and would go with anything:



And apparently, you can even make your own bauble ring. (Yes, you can. I can't.)

Maybe I'm drawn to rings like these right now because I know they will become completely impractical once my baby arrives in June and having potential choking hazards flip-flopping around on my finger won't be the best jewelry choice. Guess I should live it up with my accessories while I can!

Big mean mama

Believe it or not, Fly isn't the most obedient two-year-old this world has ever seen. I know, you are shocked. The Fly you know is smart, charming and terminally cute. But he has a strong will. If you put him on the floor in the Capitol building when Democrats and Republicans are arguing, they will agree to anything if it means finally getting him out of the District of Columbia and not having to deal with him again.

Sometimes when he doesn't listen to me, I call his bluff. For example, when we come home from being somewhere, he doesn't want to come inside. He wants to sit in the driver's seat of my car and play with the controls, run down the street, see what's in the neighbor's yard, smell the other neighbor's flowers, check the mailbox and pick up stray sticks or leaves. But I might have to pee, or I might have heavy bags of groceries, and it's time to go inside right now. Fly doesn't understand right now (unless he wants a cookie). So I might go inside and close the door, watching him from there and hoping that gets his attention.

Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't.

Today, Fly didn't want to take a nap. But I knew he was tired. I told him it was time to sleep. I went to his room, hoping he would follow me. He didn't. I would have picked him up and carried him to his room, but I am in a phase when I am trying to get him to listen to me without intervening like that. (Hey, I can hear you! Stop laughing!) Ten minutes later, he showed up, when I grabbed him and sat him in my lap as usual for some songs and talking about our day so far. Fly hurled himself off my lap and onto the floor.

Because it had already been a tantrumy day, I'd had it. "You can put yourself to sleep!" I said, calling his bluff and and retreating to another room.

And that's exactly what he did.



And when I came back and saw him curled up on the floor, I felt like a big meanie.

I think I need a time-out.

Three bloggers and a baby

Here's my last Say It Forward post. Every Friday, 5 Minutes for Mom asks for a list of up to three bloggers who loyally comment. I've played along for a month now and think I'll stop because -- even though you are all wonderfully loyal commenters -- I don't want anyone's eyes to glaze over when/if they happen by here on Fridays and stop paying attention to the bloggers I link to.

Here are more cool chiquitas.

Nicole of Naptime Optional and The Nicole Show. She seems to have so much fun on her blogs, whether it's her weekly movie quote guessing game or talking about her daughter's fairy wings.

Mozi Esme. Esme is a toddler who writes her own blog! With her mama's help, of course. She is American but lives in Mozambique, helping the people and learning about the culture there.

Melissa at Banana Migraine. Here is one crafty mama! Get this -- she spins her own yarn! Then she knits it into beautiful creations. There are always cute pics of her son and daughter on her blog.

- - - - -

It may be Friday the 13th, but it was a lucky day for Tatiana at It Was a Very Good Year, who had her baby girl, Maia, today. There are more expectant mamas on the Bustin' Out Babies list.

Someday, I might visit the Bahamas and actually not be pregnant

So over the weekend, we went to the Bahamas (I know!) to celebrate our anniversary. It was a wedding anniversary for JP and me, but it was also a sort of anniversary for Fly, who visited the Bahamas in utero on our "babymoon."

Although it's been a year and a half since Fly got his passport, this was his first international trip. (Come to think of it, it was also his first out-of-state trip.)

But Fly discovered some aspects of international travel aren't all that glamorous, like waiting in lines at the cruise port before the sun even rose.



The promise of getting on a big boat helped, though.



And it was great to look out our cabin window and see the ocean.



Or not.

The cabin was small, and the beds were slightly more comfortable than ambulance stretchers, and some characters think it's funny to photograph people while they are sleeping.



When we settled into our resort in Port Lucaya, we discovered in a cruel slap from Mother Nature that the temperature was actually a bit cooler in the Bahamas than it was at home. For about two hours, though, it was warm enough to play on the beach.





We also spent some time in the marketplace square, which couldn't be more charming.



At nighttime, there is live music in the square. Fly asked me to dance.



But he quickly turned his attention to another woman.



I couldn't compete with that.

It was fun going back to the same place we went to three years ago, only this time with friends -- and a toddler.

Not much had changed there since last time. See? Here I was, six months pregnant with Fly:



And back again, four months along with our little Junebug:



Even if I couldn't enjoy the fruity Bahama Mama drinks, I guess I kind of am a Bahama Mama.



JP and I are so glad we went back -- and we feel so blessed to have each other and celebrate another year of togetherness.

What I'd Wear Wednesday: The scarf

What I'd wear today if I could: the scarf. You know, the scarf that supposedly everyone is wearing, like maybe this one from Free People.

Several months ago, I saw a woman wearing a simple multicolored scarf and thought it looked nice. Then I found a neutral scarf I liked.

But I haven't worn it.

Since then, I've seen lots of scarf wearing.

A friend of mine has been wearing the scarf. "All the women on The Bachelor are wearing scarves," she told me, because she knows I hardly watch TV.

I know I should pull out my scarf and try it out. I'm not sure what's stopping me. It could be a case of out of sight, out of mind. Or maybe it's my fear that my already short neck will disappear completely.

Maybe I just need something more trendy or patterned, like this one from Bebe:



Or maybe this is a trend that I will just watch come and go.

What do you think about the scarf?

Help me figure out the unsolved mystery

My mother, Cammy, thinks she is pretty clever.

She called me last week to say she sent me a package . . . and that the package has a hidden message.

How very mysterious!

The suspense nearly killed me!

One thing you can't do to me is tell me you have a surprise or some news and then leave me hanging. GAH! JP does this to me all the time! Mainly, because he knows it drives me crazy. I love surprises, but don't tell me about it beforehand.

Luckily, I survived to receive and open my mother's package. I had assumed it was a little Valentine's Day gift for Fly. But this is what she sent:





OK. Grandma's cookies. I get it -- she's a grandma. (All her grandkids call her Nan.) There are two cookies in the package, and two cookies in the card -- and I will have two children come June.

But Nan's package also contained this:



The label is "Clear Crystale."

I've never been a real detective type, so I'm hoping you, teh internets, could help me out.

Am I reading too much into it? Or am I just that dense?

A nice way to say thanks

It's Say It Forward Carnival day! Every Friday, 5 Minutes for Mom asks for a list of up to three bloggers who loyally comment. This is a nice way to say thanks.

I think this is week three. It's been fun. I think I'll stop next week, though -- not because I have run out of loyal commenters, but I don't want anyone's eyes to glaze over when/if they happen by here on Fridays. Then no one will pay any attention to the bloggers I link to.

Here are more magnificent mamas.

Nadine at Just Being Me. Nadine is such a sweet, gentle and wise spirit. But she also has a fun sense of humor. Not only is she a blogger, but she is an author too -- her book Prisoner of Circumstance came out recently.

Nicole at Much More Than a Mom. I've been reading Nicole's blog for a long time. I love how devoted she is to her family. And she has another cool blog, The Opinionated Parent, where she reviews and gives away great stuff for parents.

The Angel Forever. This angel always seems to have something fun or interesting to report about her family. Or, an intriguing and helpful list. I love seeing her family photos and hope she posts pictures from her upcoming Disney trip.

- - - - -

This has nothing to do with anything, but I just wanted to point out my constantly updated list of expecting mom bloggers. If you're expecting a baby and want to be on the list, just let me know at growingalife at gmail dot com.

What I'd Wear Wednesday: Red

What I'd wear today if I could: red. Today is a bit early, but Feb. 6 is Wear Red Day in honor of Go Red for Women, the American Heart Association's awareness campaign about heart disease in women. This is one of the official Go Red items from the Shop Heart online store.

(Psst! You would think breast cancer is the top killer of women as far as diseases go. But it's actually heart disease! You can find out more at the Go Red for Women site.)

Even though today isn't Wear Red Day, if you wear red to Macy's any time Feb. 4-8, you can save 15-20% on your purchases.

Anything in red will do on Go Red Day. How about those ubiquitous, super-cheap Valentine's Day tees from Tarjhay?



Or this flowy blouse from Anthropologie:



This tie-neck sweater from J. Jill?:



I think everyone looks good in red -- you just have to find the right shade for you. As for myself, almost every time I wear red, someone compliments me. To that, I say, "Go red!"

20-week belly bump

Here I am, halfway through my pregnancy today!

Belly shot in all my sexy loungewear glory by request of Kristi at Interrupted Wanderlust.

PS. Kristi didn't ask for me to wear loungewear or anything specific. She just suggested I post belly shots.

PPS. I am being sarcastic in saying my loungewear is sexy.

PPPS. Don't you think "belly shots" could be something they serve at a bar off someone's navel?

A bright spot in my day

Despite Fly indicating our family is a bunch of monkeys, today's ultrasound showed a good-sized, healthy human baby.



The doctor pointed out the baby has a bright spot on the heart, or echogenic cardiac focus. Apparently, this isn't a heart defect and doesn't affect how the baby's heart operates.

However, the bright spot can indicate the baby has a chromosomal abnormality like Down Syndrome, she said. There were no other indicators of a chromosomal disorder in my ultrasound, so the doctor said she would call it a "normal variant" and that babies without any abnormalities can have the bright spot on the heart. She didn't seem worried at all and said when I go back for my final ultrasound 10 weeks from now, the bright spot might have disappeared by then.

She said we could do an amniocentesis, but JP and I are too chicken for that. We have come too far with this baby to risk losing the baby to a test. I know the risk is a small one -- and the amnio would tell us for sure whether the baby has Down Syndrome -- but we are declining.

Nothing else indicates our baby has Down Syndrome or another chromosomal disorder. But if that's what we discover when the baby is born, we will love our baby all the same. Our baby is our baby, and we are blessed no matter what.

Well, I'll be a monkey's mama

In preparation for tomorrow's ultrasound . . . .

"Fly, do you know we're going to see the baby tomorrow?"

"A baby!"

"That's right!"

"An animal!"

"No, it's not an animal."

"A monkey! Ooo-ooo-ah-ah."

"No, it's a human baby . . . your . . . it's one of us . . . a baby baby."

"Ooo-ooo-ah-ah!"