Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Flybaby's new friend

My friend Star just had her baby boy this evening! If you have the chance to visit her blog and send her virtual hugs, I know she'd love it.

When Star's dear husband called me very early this morning (yes, I was awake, of course) to tell me they were on the way to the hospital (now that's a friend), I started thinking back to my own ride to the hospital. My own labor. My own hospital stay. I mean, after I said a prayer for Star first. Even though Flybaby isn't even three months old yet, here I am nursing him after getting the call, and reminiscing about those early days. Waxing nostalgic, as they say. Thinking about the good ol' days.

But they weren't so good.

There are many things I still regret about my labor, like how the HypBirth method didn't work for me, how I carried on (and loudly) for hours, how I waited until the last possible moment to get an epidural.

After coming home with Fly, I regret allowing so many people to suck up my time to the point JP and I were eating dinner at 10 p.m. the first two nights we were home. Ten people came to visit the day after we brought Fly home! Why was I entertaining them?! Why did they get a seat in the family room, and not me?!

I regret doing too much too soon after Flybaby's birth. I didn't want to appear weak or needy. But now I wish I had rested more. To heck with the dirty floors and running out of milk I don't drink.

I regret having such a hard time breastfeeding.

But there's nothing that I can change. Don't most of us do that? We wish we could go back in time and fix things. We realize it's too late for "should-haves." All we can do is the best we can, here in the moment.

So I try to make each day the best for Flybaby, JP and me. Because this mama doesn't need to live with more regrets -- or pass them on to him.

And I hope that's what Star and her family -- and any other new mamas reading this -- will take to heart.


Blogger Nichole said...

Congratulations to your friend's new bundle of joy, and to Fly baby's new friend!

I had the same thoughts with Eleana. At 3 months it seemed labor had been ages ago, and yet it seemed like only yesterday.

Now, the random food on my "neat sheet" in the dining room causes me to remember those days when all Eleana required was a bottle of milk.

10:40 AM  
Blogger Freckle Face Girl said...

I would do many things over again too. Fortunately, most of our friends & family don't live around us so too many visitors wasn't the problem.

Congrats to your friend. Hope it goes well.

1:11 PM  
Blogger Erika Jurney said...

Amen to that! Moving on is great for the soul.

2:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Aw - congrats to your friend!!

8:05 PM  
Blogger LBA said...

Well, for starters, you can't REGRET problems with b'feeding - NOT. YOUR. FAULT. Not your fault !

People are horrified with how I refused visitors. I texted everyone via mobile phone, then took my hospital phone off the hook. I regret my FOUR visitors ( I relented, I wanted NONE, and will do so again, if I get the chance - NONE. My time with baby, my time ... )

When we got home, we refused visitors for a week, then had one big luncheon where everyone could come at once. BEST. IDEA. EVER.
So it was 2wks post-birth before I allowed anyone near me besides the husband. It was great.

Funnily enough though, we also started selling our house as soon as we got home from hospy .. so although I wasn't seeing people, there were real estate agents galore, and inspections.

Crazy days :)

Congrats to your friend - I am off to look at her blog !

12:35 AM  
Blogger Mamacita Tina said...

Three months apart in age, oh yes, they will become good buddies.

No regrets, just lessons to learn from. Like housework, put it on hold, your baby doesn't stay a baby for long. Enjoy that baby NOW!

7:36 AM  

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