Instructions for babysitting
So, JP's parents will be here in about an hour so we can go out with our friends (our fifth date since Flybaby was born). Last time they watched Flybaby, JP's mom told me Fly had been so good and sweet.
Good? Sweet? Is that the baby I know?
I've given Fly instructions on how he should act around his grandparents -- just like himself:
- Be sure to squeal very loudly and in the highest pitch your voice can muster.
- Be sure to flip over onto all fours when your memaw tries to change your diaper, and attempt to crawl across the top of the dresser.
- When she tries to feed you your dinner, turn your head away at the last second so there's a line of food smeared across your cheek. Then rub your hands across your face and into your hair and eyelashes.
- And after dinner, be sure to cry as though you're being branded when your grandmother tries to wash the food off your face and out of your hair.
- Knock everything off the coffee table, then walk down the hall into the next room to look for more things to knock over.
- And don't forget to cry for no apparent reason, periodically throughout the evening.
Have fun!
Good? Sweet? Is that the baby I know?
I've given Fly instructions on how he should act around his grandparents -- just like himself:
- Be sure to squeal very loudly and in the highest pitch your voice can muster.
- Be sure to flip over onto all fours when your memaw tries to change your diaper, and attempt to crawl across the top of the dresser.
- When she tries to feed you your dinner, turn your head away at the last second so there's a line of food smeared across your cheek. Then rub your hands across your face and into your hair and eyelashes.
- And after dinner, be sure to cry as though you're being branded when your grandmother tries to wash the food off your face and out of your hair.
- Knock everything off the coffee table, then walk down the hall into the next room to look for more things to knock over.
- And don't forget to cry for no apparent reason, periodically throughout the evening.
Have fun!
posted by Damselfly at 4:00 PM
14 Comments:
hehe Those instructions are awesome!
Not a chance. Only angels for grandparents. Devils for parents.
Ain't it the truth?!
Oh gosh! This brings back memories of my daughter especially. That turning the head thing so the food ends up on the cheek, then the hair, etc. Soooo accurate!
LOL!
I hope you had a great evening out and flybaby had fun with the grandparents as well! =)
That was hilarious. Thanks for the laugh. I hope you have a great date.
Ha! In an hour's time? He won't even have time to warm up!
Ya, Fly can do all those things and more and I'm sure his grandparents will still think he's good and sweet and a perfect angel.
Don't forget, cry for no reason and fling yourself on the floor as if you are dying. Enjoy your night out!
Yeah. Right. Like he's going to give you any credibility. They'll just continue to look at you like you're a complaining nutso anytime you describe his usual antics.
hmph.
(hope you had fun!)
I'm curious to know how it went with them! (I know that he was still awake when you got home, but that was the only detail I heard you mention, tsk tsk.)
LOL. I could have written this post myself. Whenever I run an errand and leave Isabella with one of my relatives for a few hours, they always report that she was "perfect" while I was gone. Clearly, she has multiple personalities, because while she is many things, "perfect" isn't one of them!
PS: Hope you had a great date night!
Hm...that sounds EXACTLY like my daughter. The other day she was acting in exactly this fassion with plenty of tantrums thrown in and when my mother came over she started smiling and being a little sweetheart! What is it with kids?
How did it go?
And I added a link to you o Jodifur. I'm just getting around to updating my blogroll
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