Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Recall nation?

JP's ever-recall-vigilant mother, MM, called me this weekend to let me know Gerber organic oatmeal was recalled because it clumps.

I told MM that Flybaby eats this cereal every morning for breakfast, and I have yet to see a clump. Besides, if there was a clump, I could just mash it with a spoon until it was smooth. Right?

Where were the recall people when Fly's teething toy broke into bits?

I'm not sure I'm hip to this recall business. Some things, like the oatmeal, are recalled for stupid reasons, while other things, like the teething toy, aren't even on the recall radar.

Makes you wonder what other hazards are lurking out there to endanger our children?

Like this ball.

If a toddler were to come over and bounce this ball too hard, it could hit Flybaby on the head! Gah! It might even leave a red mark on his head for two whole minutes!

Or, take this rabbit:

Looks innocent enough. But how do I know this little fuzzmeister won't produce ferocious lint that Flybaby could choke on? What if one of our cats gets Bunny, rips a hole in him, and little beans start spilling out of him, creating another choking hazard?!

That leads us to another "softy," Mr. Octopus.

As a battery-operated toy, this creates electromagnetic radiation, and you know what that means: mutant! children!

Even soft blocks can be dangerous.

They teach impressionable young children that animals and celestial bodies smile when, in fact, they do not.

Look at the evidence. Where is the outrage? When are we parents going to stand up to this kind of lackadaisical attitude about our children's welfare?!

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Blogger Kristi said...

The dangers! They are everywhere! Where's that baby-sized bubble when you need it?

2:21 PM  
Blogger Melissa @ Banana Migraine said...

Hee Hee - We use the same cereal too - I never noticed a problem.

2:39 PM  
Blogger Awesome Mom said...

What evil toys you have!

When the Thomas the Train recall happened we got a flood of emails from concerned relatives. Never mind that Evan and Harry would have had to have chewed the trains to bits and still would not have had enough lead in them to actually do any brain damage.

2:45 PM  
Blogger Freckle Face Girl said...

My husband is Mr. Safety and I just laugh. I tell there that her odds are good. We didn't have nearly as many safety restraints & we lived.

3:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heh. You is funny. ;-)

8:58 PM  
Blogger Cathy, Amy and Kristina said...

So true! Love your observation regarding the blocks.

10:05 PM  
Blogger Mama's Moon said...

Toys? Your kids get 'toys'? With smiley faces on them, even??? You mean, you don't just let them roam the house getting into the pots and pans, and whatnots? The only bunnies residing in our place are the dusty ones below the sofa....

11:45 PM  
Blogger M said...

HAHAHAH! Hilarious.

7:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL! I've been eying Lydia's toys with the same sneaking suspicion!

11:14 AM  
Blogger Mamacita Tina said...

This made me laugh!

Yes, danger lurks around every corner. Hey kids, you're going to have to eat with your hands because you might poke your eye out with those plastic utensils.

3:46 PM  
Blogger Candace April said...

You know...I was just thinking the same thing about the same freakin' recall.

When they recall cereal because it might be too lumpy (never mind that the package even discusses how to mix oatmeal with water--HOW TO MIX OATMEAL, PEOPLE!--they have gone too far!

3:40 PM  
Blogger groovyoldlady said...

Aaaaaaaaack! What we all need are dogs to chew up the baby toys for us!!!!!

8:18 AM  

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